If it is... I'm all updated with that. I am fully aware we're not going anywhere (and suddenly I hear someone says "WHATS THE POINT?") but I love him --- I really do. @@
I just had to walk away there because I cant stand another laughter..and it was time for my part as well.
I woke up today without any dilemmas in between -- i felt it was really going to be awesome -- or so I'd thought.
well, I was supposed to look like it was just an ordinary game and i'll be there watching.
(by the way, I usually get lazy when I have plans. Even if it the hottest guy in school is going to play or anything I go back to bed, but today, it was weird I was up and ready for it)
So I was there with whispered cheers. I watched.. he noticed I was there but he just gave me a smile..
he was tired so I understand why he didn't talk to me.
then someone came, close to him. I understand that part -- its just that why do i have to be there frozen while they laugh and yadah yadah. dammit! this is my time. @@
well, it was time for me to leave, I walked away, fighting the urge not to cry but it fell.
how embarrassing -- akala mo naman may boyfriend ako.
another, she was with him and I was standing infront of them -- he didn't even say Hi or Hey, Galingan mo sa Doodle. --- that's the time I thought maybe he does like her that he forgets there are people around him -- I'm a friend. @@
I know it's stupid to wait for you, but everytime I try to move on, my hearts keeps insisting that you're the one.And I was all alone with my hatred and pain that was so bad, it was like being tortured. Like being dragged slowly across a bed of razor blades. Pain was so bad you'd take death with a smile just to get away from it.
All mt emotions are mixed, I don't know what to feel anymore, it is all painful :'(
I was happy until I realized how hurt I actually was.you know what? sometimes, it is better like this -- better to keep it all inside, where the only person that could judge is yourself.
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